Help! My rich team teacher is wasting his students with gifts

Dear WeAreTeachers:
My fellow teachers don’t have to work. Teaching is his legitimate hobby. He spends most of the money he earns in his class, if not all. He buys outstanding gifts for all his students and even orders almost weekly dordash / pizza. Now I’m not saying he’s not a great teacher. He usually likes his job, but being his teammate is tiring. I am a single parent who needs to teach and work in the attendance program so that I can finish. And yet her class has a pizza party every Friday. I can say it annoys my students that they don’t get matching shirts, special lunches and expensive gifts to wear. I think I’m not good enough at times. – Love can’t buy me

Dear CBML,
It is very common for us to fall into the trap of comparison in our personal and professional contexts. You are working hard for your family and seeing day by day for your students. Your value is not based on what your teammates do or don’t do. And your teammate’s materialistic approach sounds pretty extreme. Behavior has meaning and perhaps this teacher feels somewhat insecure with the core, complex aspects of teaching. This teacher may like kids, but shower students with gifts Accessories What a great teacher it is. Do you hear students repeatedly say, “What do I get?”

Take a few moments to think about your favorite teachers throughout all seasons of your life. What made them effective and memorable for you? I would like to say that your favorite teachers have probably given birth to your curiosity and amazement, encouraging you to engage in self-reflection and build meaningful, empathetic relationships, value multiple perspectives, boost your confidence socially and academically and communicate more effectively. Yes, you can remember a pizza party here and there, but I’m sure lasting memories are more about how you felt and what you learned.

So what’s the problem with focusing on external rewards and materialism? This may sound innocent, but as Adela Hunting writes, “Unfortunately, external motivation can also lead to loss of enjoyment in activities that were previously pleasurable internally. Teachers who focus on gifts, rewards, and prizes can have unintended consequences of overcoming the more subtle joy of learning and progress.

We’ve all seen temporary spikes of emotion while showering with gifts. The point is, it has no lasting effect. “It should come as no surprise to anyone who tracks the science of happiness, which suggests that material things cannot enhance our happiness in a sustainable or meaningful way. Indeed, research suggests that materialistic people are less happy than their peers. They feel less positive emotions. , Less satisfied with life and suffering from higher levels of anxiety, depression and substance abuse. ” So, your students may be fascinated on things, but you as a person influence them more than what you buy.

It’s so easy to focus on what you can control and it’s hard to keep up with the practice. Let’s try to stay in your alley, ready with family, your well-being, strong relationships with your students and your plans and guidance. I argue that the role of teachers as your team partner professional is diminishing, and if you have the strength and courage, try to have a conversation with a trusted leader on your site to share what you are noticing and feeling.

Dear WeAreTeachers:
I had pudding and sprite at my year-end party. And I know it went against the rules, but I think it was okay for the last day. Remember, the admin has previously rewarded appearances with Popsicles. I guess my kids said one or the other, but the administrator found out. When it was time for dismissal, suddenly our interlocutor came to my door telling me that he was taking my kids to the gate. And he shared that my principal and AP are coming to talk to me. I couldn’t say goodbye to my students, hug them or let my parents take pictures with me. Instead, I sat in my classroom and handed over a written warning for policy violations. Do you have any suggestions? -Time is everything

Dear TIE,
Happy summer to you! I hope you find a way to recharge. The end of the school year is always so full of activity and passion. I’m sure you’re not the only teacher to celebrate this exciting time with some sweet treats. The point is, timing matters. You should have walked to your kids’ gate, and I’m sorry you had to feel the warmth, the gratitude, the relief, and the shock of the connection fading. While missing the final farewell was frustrating and amazing, I hope you know that your impact transcends and endures this kind of snuff.

Let your principal know that it was annoying to miss walking outside with your kids for the last day of dismissal. We all know that relationships are the heart of education!

The schools are full of hypocrisy. A good example is the principal who passes out the popsicles and then rules you out for a small treat on the last day. Counseling agency Straight Talk explains that “everyone has a tendency to be hypocritical at some point. It is virtually impossible to survive entirely in our own moral code, because we all make mistakes. We may sincerely believe in objective morality, but we can justify ourselves when it comes to our shortcomings. “

So, yes, we all make mistakes and this sweet treat is a secondary one. And maybe your principal thinks their rewards are worthy and not your year-end party.

It is understandable that schools have become more strict about food over the years. In some places, food is often used as an external stimulus. I knew that every birthday celebration and prize party centered on junk food. My daughters ate pizza, chips and cupcakes at school several times a month. There are many people who have eating restrictions (including my kids), and inevitably some students have dropped out due to health problems. This can feel awful to a student. Although some teachers arrange alternatives, it often seems uncomfortable for children.

I’ve tried to get parents of elementary-school-aged kids to spend money on beautifully read books instead of processed foods but it never got traction. Imagine a birthday celebration where the child presents a favorite book in class and the teacher has a special seat in front while reading. The bookplate inside can be a meaningful offering for the child and the classroom library will also be filled with these personal treasures.

Dear WeAreTeachers:
My principal met with me one by one and shared the news that they thought it was time for me to try a grade-level change. They even said that the sixth grade team would benefit a lot from getting me. The truth is I am very nervous about changing my grade-level from kindergarten to sixth grade. I like to be with the little ones, although it can be so much more modeled and the tasks can be broken down into digestible parts. Sixth-grade math feels awful and I’m worried that the kids won’t relate to me or like me. I’m also insecure that they’re removing me because they think I didn’t do well enough. Should I move to school or try sixth grade once? – Sixth grade scares me

Dear SGSM,
Grade changes can bring a lot of mixed emotions! It’s normal to feel a little shaky at the moment. And believe that what you know and what you do well with young students will also help you in the sixth-grade classroom setting. Attending your teacher, intentional planning, instruction, monitoring progress, and establishing a caring classroom community are important in any of your grades.

So many educators feel a kind of fear about working with older students. Often people think that sixth graders lack motivation or interest in school. This can happen in some situations, and we still have the ability to create an inviting, welcoming, engaging classroom culture. I say try the sixth grade once. Either way, whether you choose a new grade level or a new school, you need to do some extra work.

Try not to take grade-level change as a negative. Principals are often working to create more effective team dynamics based on the strengths of teachers. Yes, sixth grade is often the first year of middle school and it is full of all kinds of changes and challenges. But you can do it! Your grade-level team can help you change and organize for complex ideas, especially math. Be honest with your principal and let them know that you will appreciate some on-the-clock planning and collaboration time with your team.

Your sixth graders will appreciate the choice, the freedom and the responsibility. Consider taking children out for meaningful, relevant, and hands-on learning experiences. Richard Lowe has written several books on the role of nature for children in shaping a meaningful life. Mixing “Vitamin N (Nature)” with your students can really inspire and inspire.

Your older students need support and guidance when they grow up. Dive in and enjoy the deep connections and ideas that you can feel together. The WeAreTeachers community has put together some excellent sixth-grade resources to boost your confidence and excitement about this big change time.

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Dear WeAreTeachers:
I have just finished my first year of teaching and are officially on summer vacation. I noticed that any time my husband is reminded that I won’t be working for the next three months, it really goes under his skin. He didn’t actually say anything rude or pick any fight with me about it but just commented here and there. “It’s getting late আছে well, I don’t think it’s for you anymore.” I think it’s more of a jealous thing, because he doesn’t like his job and his salary is lower than mine. I think it’s hard to accept that I’m getting this “prok” with a higher salary. So how do I remedy this situation?

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